‘i can’t describe to you how surprised i was to find out i loved her, old sport. i even hoped for a while that she’d throw me over, but she didn’t, because she was in love with me too. she thought i knew a lot because i knew different things from her.. well, there i was, way off my ambitions, getting deeper in love every minute, and all of a sudden i didn’t care. what was the use of doing great things if i could have a better time telling her what i was going to do?’
‘he smiled understandingly - much more than understandingly. it was one of those rare smiles with a quality of eternal reassurance in it, that you may come across four or five times in life. it faces - or seemed to face - the whole eternal world for an instant, and then concentrated on you with an incredible prejudice in your favor. it understood you just so far as you wanted to be understood, believed in you as you would like to believe in yourself, and assured you that it had precisely the impression of you that, at your best, you hoped to convey.’
i know it’s sort of fucked up but whenever i feel alright for a few days in a row i deliberately think of things that hurt me because feeling miserable is destructive and comfortable at the same time
